28 May 2007

monday morning mayhem...

1. Vietnam Vets,
...says Roseanne Barr. I have a lot of empathy for them. They had to go to a horrible place and perform a hideous job for people who didn't appreciate it.

I know what that's like; I used to be a waitress at Denny's.

2. P.J. O'Rourke on Bill Maher, Friday, May 25, 2007.
Republicans should never skip their meds.

3. Dispatcher 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have
an eleven on it.

Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one.
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

[Yes, this is from the transcript of a real 9-1-1 call!]


4. My new car has so much horse power...
...and is fun to drive. I tend to have a heavy foot on the gas pedal. I blame it on the turbo engine.

Anyway, I got stopped for speeding the other day.

I thought I could talk my way out of it,
until the cop looked at my dog in the back seat...






Speed Kills

oh my...

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