06 December 2010

child abuse...

The Fight Against Child Abuse - today is the International Day for the Elimination of Child Abuse. it has really caught on at FaceBook; some people question what good is changing a profile picture;

if it effects only 1 person, it is good!

in my career in Education i have seen & dealt with too many, and too many is more than one, abused children and each one broke my heart...

19 August 2010

no one is alone...

sung by Bernadette Peters
from "Into The Woods"
by Stephen Sondheim

No one here to guide you
Now you're on your own
Only me beside you
Still your not alone
No one is alone
No one is alone

Sometimes people leave you
Half-way through the wood
Others may decieve you
You decide whats good
You decide alone
But no one is alone

People make mistakes
Father's, Mother's
People make mistakes
Holding to their own
Thinking they're alone

Honor their mistakes
Everybody makes
One another's terrible mistakes

Witches can be right
Giants can be good
You decide whats right
You decide whats good
Just remember

Someone is on your side
Someone else is not
Well we're seeing our side
Maybe we forgot
They are not alone
Cause no one is alone

Hard to see the light now
Just don't let it go
Things will come out right now
We can make it so
Someone is on your side
No one is alone

cross posted on my macarthur park website...

13 August 2010

monday morning mayhem...

beware the copy room...

Ghost copy

Ole's special diet...

Ole was turning 88 and was overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet.

Doc: 'I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.

When Ole returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60 lbs!

Why, that's amazing!' the doctor said, 'Did you follow my instructions? '

Ole nodded..... I'll tell you though, by Golly, I thought I wuz gonna drop dead on dat 3rd day.

'From the hunger, you mean?' asked the doctor.

Ole: 'Hell no, it wuz from all dat damn skippin'!

ummm, yes... Ole is a blonde..............


09 August 2010

monday morning mayhem...

As we Silver Surfers know, sometimes we have trouble with our computers.

I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over.
Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong?

He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,
'An ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?

'No,' I replied.

'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down:


I used to like Eric, the little s**t.

02 August 2010

monday morning mayhem...


from Athiestcartoons.com

my thanks to Richard Scott for the heads up on this one...

home invasion; just when you thought you were safe...

A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds couple in bed. He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair.

While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up & goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: 'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years.

I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain... do what ever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong, Honey. I love you!'

His wife responds: 'He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline..... I told him it was in the bathroom.

research confirms that drinking gives you the same benefits yoga does !!!

yoga & Drinking

Hysterical Dog.gif
i don't understand why Maxx isn't in better shape!!!

30 July 2010


finally, the answer to one of the most annoying questions...

two stupid chickens

and for anyone looking at office departures...

the importance of sentence structure...

The boss had to fire somebody, and he narrowed it down to one of two people: Mary or Jack. It was an impossible decision because they were both decent workers.

Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning.

Mary came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night. She went to the cooler to take an aspirin.

The boss approached her and said, "Mary, I've never done this before, but I have to lay you or Jack off."

"Could you jack off?" she said. "I feel like shit this morning."

he's so embarrased...

23 July 2010


and that's when the fight started...

My partner was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

He was not happy with what he saw and said to me,

"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

I replied, "Your eyesight's near perfect."

and that's when the fight started........

Maxx Happy.gif

16 July 2010


and that's how it started...

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my partner kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of.

First, the truck, the car, new playlists, always something more important to me.

Finally he thought of a clever way to make his point. When I arrived home one day, I found him seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of scissors.

I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed him a toothbrush.

I said, 'When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.'

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp...

Maxx New Friends.gif

12 July 2010

monday morning mayhem...

the weekend report...

So I lost the pub trivia contest over the weekend by 1 point.


The last question was, "Where do women have the curliest hair?"

.......apparently the correct answer is Fiji

Hysterical Dog.gif
you all have a dirty mind...


Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.

who'd a-thought...

new demographic map of Florida...

map of florida

why didn't SCOTUS have this map in 2000 with the Bush v. Gore case? i'm only going all the way south to the Keys; you know - Margaritaville and Gay Haven...

one of the perks of turning 60...

People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?

oh, and...

Tab Hunter & Biography

Tab Hunter turned 79 years old yesterday! Damn...

Chickent legs.gif

25 June 2010



A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery.

He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic Hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his treatment.

She asked, 'Do you have health insurance?'

He replied in a raspy voice, 'No health insurance.'

The nun asked, 'Do you have money in the bank?'

He replied, 'No money in the bank.'

The nun asked, 'Do you have a relative who could help you?'

He said, 'I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun.'

The nun became agitated and announced loudly, 'Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.'

The patient replied, 'Then send the bill to my brother-in-law."

i knew Simon would get it!
it was a 'roofer' for Maxx...

21 June 2010

monday morning mayhem...

Jack Daniels Fishing Story

I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait.


Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.

Jack Daniels bottle

A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There was that same snake with two more frogs in his mouth.

Life is good in the South.

18 June 2010


Stuttering Cat - as explained by a 1st grade student...

A teacher is explaining biology to her 1st grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter," she said.

A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered."

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

"Well," she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!"

"That must've been scary," said the teacher.

"It sure was," said the little girl. "My kitty raised her back, went "Ffffff!, Ffffff!, FfffffF, but before she could say "Fuck!," the Rottweiler ate her!

The teacher had to leave the room.

lauging chipmunk
Maxx brought home a new friend;
he says he's related to Alvin;
i doubt it...

11 June 2010


Bubba goes to college...

A professor at the University of West Virginia was giving a lecture on the supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks: "How many people here believe in ghosts?"

About 90 students raise their hands.

"Well, that's a good start.

"Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?"

About 40 students raise their hands.

"That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously.

"Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?"

About 15 students raise their hand.

"Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?"

Three students raise their hands.

"That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further.

"Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?"

Way in the back, Bubba raises his hand.

The professor takes off his glasses and says: "Son, all the Years I've been giving this lecture no one has ever claimed To have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience."

The big redneck student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium.

When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks: "So, Bubba, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost."

Bubba replied: "Shiiiit!! From way back there I thought you said "Goats"


07 June 2010

monday morning mayhem...

for the return of monday morning mayhem what better than my favorite subject - kids! and these are some doozies...

Why we love children:


I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'


On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she aske d her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'


A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'

5) POLICE #1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop?' 'Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. 'My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

6) POLICE #2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'


While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'


A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.''And why not, darling?' 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'


While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.

The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)


A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'


A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it . What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.
'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out.'What have you got there, dear?' With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!'

the entire gang loved all of these...

Hysterical Dog.gif

Maxx New Friends.gif



Chickent legs.gif

me too...

Statler & Waldorf Wonderful gif

06 June 2010

long time...

long, long time...

i hadn't realized how long;

the most recent post - April 24th - was right before the last couple of surgeries i had to have, and they were the worst of all i've had over the last 2 1/2 years; even worse than the back surgeries;

i didn't realize how difficult these were going to be; i say these because they did two at the same time; the major one was a trans urethral resection of the prostate; the secondary one was the removal of a very large growth that grew very quickly on one of the testicles; luckily a benign cyst that had to be removed along with the epididymis;

(i know - too much information, but the truth is the truth)

the second one, understandably, was the most painful and uncomfortable; if you're male and never had something like this done, you can only imagine what the aftermath was like! thank the fates for Vicodin;

in the meantime, i've been spending most of my time using Facebook; it's quick; it's easy; and most of the time keeps you up-to-date;

i'm not completely sold on it, but it has been a really good source for news that doesn't make the major media;

of course, this is due to the fact that i've been fairly selective on who friends are; (friends is really quite a misnomer; only 5-6 on my list are truly friends in the real sense of the word!)

the worst seems to be passed, but they tell me it will take a couple of more months before most of the after effects go away;

i am rethinking a lot of things with this last episode of life and i am looking it over and deciding that another make-over is in order; i've done this before and always had a good time doing it;

i'm just not exactly certain what the change is going to be, but like i said, i want to have fun doing it...

glad to see you all again and there already is a monday morning mayhem ready for posting...

23 April 2010


setting a secure password...

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:


When asked why she had such a long password, she said,

'Duh! I was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital!'

i know, i know. another blonde joke, but i haven't done one in a while; actually i haven't done any jokes in a while...

Blond martini.gif

03 April 2010

this is the first post from the new iPad...

after five hours of exploring it and using it for the first time I have only one thing to say


this can really change computing for so many people.

I wasn't sure about getting one until a couple of days ago when I realized that most of the time I work connected and, even when I am working on other things, they have to be shared with others via email.

AND, though I primarily use a Macbook, this portability is unique.

With the addition of Pages as an app, the Apple word processing program, that i use all the time and convert to either Word documents or PDF for others to see, it suddenly dawned that it would work for me.

And it does!

One of the best features is being able to read newspapers that I read from around the world --- not to mention using it with FaceBook.

more to come...

02 April 2010


looking for a new job? Ole was too.

Ole wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes a little math test.

Here is your first question, the foreman said. 'Without using numbers, represent the number 9.'

'Without numbers?' Ole says, 'Dat's easy.' and proceeds to draw three trees.

number 9

'What's this?' the boss asks.

'Vot! you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,' says Ole.

'Fair enough,' says the boss. 'Here's your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99.'

Ole stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. 'Dar ya go.'

number 99

The boss scratches his head and says, 'How on earth do you get that to represent 99?'

'Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.'

The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire this Norwegian, so he says, 'All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.'

Ole stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, 'Dar ya go. Von hundred.'

number 100

The boss looks at the attempt. 'You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!'

Ole leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, 'A little dog come along and pooped by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, vich makes von hundred.'

'So, ven do I start? '

Maxx New Friends.gif

you had to know these two would get it...

28 March 2010

monday morning mayhem...

Rednecks are good at sensitive stuff...

Three rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower: Cooter, Ronnie and Donnie.

As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed - instantly.

As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, 'Well, dang, someone should go and tell his wife.'

Donnie says, 'OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it.'

Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.

Ronnie says, 'Where did you get that beer, Donnie ?'

'Cooter's wife gave it to me,' Donnie replies.

'That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?'

'Well, not exactly', Donnie says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Cooter's widow.'"

She said, 'You must be mistaken. I'm not a widow.' Then I said, 'I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.'

like the man said - Rednecks are good at sensitive stuff.

22 March 2010

monday morning mayhem...

the veterinarian...

One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week!

The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope o n the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.

"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated.

"Why yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money and I give some of it to the church."

The pastor replied, "That's wonderful. But $1000 is a lot, are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?"

The elderly woman answered, "$10,000 a week."

The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?"

"He is a veterinarian," she answered.

"That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money," the pastor said. "Where does he practice?"

The woman answered proudly, "In Nevada... He has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas , and one in Reno'


keep this in mind for work this week...

Maxine B.S.

15 March 2010

monday morning mayhem...

your duck is dead!

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.

He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head..

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. The duck's owner, still in shock,took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry.. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."

that's it, just the one this week because...

we are ALL ROTFLOAO...



Maxx New Friends.gif

Hysterical Dog.gif

and they wonder why we need health care reform?

08 March 2010

monday morning mayhem...

Mountain-William alarm system...

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Bertha, Duke, Slim, and I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway. I
locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside. I'll be right back.


let's have some fun this week...
  1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer at Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down;
  2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom... Don't Disguise Your Voice!
  3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
  4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
  5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana'.
  6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get...
  7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious face.
  8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
  9. Sing Along At The Opera.
  10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
  11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
  12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
  13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
15. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity -


Send This list To Someone To Make Them Smile. It's Called...


Widdle Wabbit...

A precious little girl walks into a petsmart shop and asks, in the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"

As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level and asks, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit, or a thoft and fuwwy, bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?"

She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says, in a tiny quiet voice,

"I don't think my python weawwy gives a thit."

snake cartoon

Hysterical Dog.gif
Maxx really liked the Wabbit one.
go figure...

05 March 2010


WARNING: gratuitous blonde joke...

During a recent password audit at a company, it was found that a blonde receptionist was using the following password:


When asked why she had such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

blond laughing

03 March 2010

it's great to be an activist...

but there comes a time when you start to get tired of fighting, when you question if it makes a difference at all, when it may be time to let others, younger, keep the ball rolling...

on the other hand, i remember my friend Father Philip Berrigan & his brother Daniel; what if they had decided to give up? would Vietnam still be a nation in turmoil?

at the same time, i realize that they had a single-minded goal; no, not just to end the war, but to awaken humanity; the conversations were about inhumanity and how it prevented us from moving forward to treat each other in peace.

here we are 40 years later and we still are fighting the foes of humanity; we are battling the false witness of ultra-right, christianist wingnuts who tear down instead of build up; we struggle with proving what is just and fair when they merely come from a power struggle mentality;

i fight with myself daily trying to make a decision that i'm not sure i want to make, but each day as i read about the inequities of healthcare, the discrimination of lgbtq, the economic problems of families struggling to make a life for themselves, and the movement towards a theocratic country and i get closer and closer to that decision - one to get out...


get your mind out of the gutter...

but... imho, the teabaggers have been hijacked by the far right and Faux News in direct opposition to what baggers want; and the Becks et al have kept hidden from them the truth on what they historically are basing their 'movement' on"

"It turns out that that the tea baggers, led in part by Michelle Malkin, Glenn Reynolds and the Coward Rick Santelli, are politically more in line with the tax policies of King George than the views of the Sons of Liberty and the colonial patriots. The tax baggers emulating a protest against a corporate tax cut — but, oddly, in support of tax cuts for the rich and corporations. Furthermore, King George was against a corporate bailout loan. And so are the tea baggers."
Suzie-Q's Truth and Justice Blog, 3/18/09

if you look closely before the Palin's, Becks etc got a hold on the teabaggers, you will see that they started out wanting the same change that Obama campaigned on; namely, getting the biggest government ever created, by Tsar George, to move in reverse; the Faux News people won't let the blame fall where it belongs; they use nationalism, progressiveness, communism, nazis, etc as their watch words to keep the fear level high;

btw, it wasnt' British tea that was dumped in the harbor - it was Dutch

Olbermann's Special Comment...

if you saw Keith Olbermann the other night in his Special Comment regarding a followup on his father's illness and "Death Panels", he said that though his father has been semi-conscious he has been reading to him; one thing he's been reading are short stories by James Thurber.

he ended the Special Comment by reading the story below.

The Peacelike Mongoose

by James Thurber

In cobra country a mongoose was born one day who didn't want to fight cobras or anything else. The word spread from mongoose to mongoose that there was a mongoose who didn't want to fight cobras. If he didn't want to fight anything else, it was his own business, but it was the duty of every mongoose to kill cobras or be killed by cobras.

"Why?" asked the peacelike mongoose, and the word went around that the strange new mongoose was not only pro-cobra and anti-mongoose but intellectually curious and against the ideals and traditions of mongooism.

"He is crazy," cried the young mongoose's father.

"He is sick," said his mother.

"He is a coward," shouted his brothers.

"He is a mongoosexual," whispered his sisters.

Strangers who had never laid eyes on the peacelike mongoose remembered that they had seen him crawling on his stomach, or trying on cobra hoods, or plotting the violent overthrow of Mongoosia.

"I am trying to use reason and intelligence," said the strange new mongoose.

"Reason is six-sevenths of treason," said one of his neighbors.

"Intelligence is what the enemy uses," said another.

Finally, the rumor spread that the mongoose had venom in his sting, like a cobra, and he was tried, convicted by a show of paws, and condemned to banishment.

Moral: Ashes to ashes, and clay to clay, if the enemy doesn't get you, your own folks may.

sadly, the people who most need to here this story probably wouldn't understand it; i wonder if the word moral might have something to do with it?


Chickent legs.gif

01 March 2010

monday morning mayhem...

sheesh - another two feet of snow!...

two feet of snow

keyboard for old men...

keyboard for old men

Maxx brought a new friend home while i was away;
this one is fun...

12 February 2010


Clean your computer screen!

You probably don't clean your computer screen very often and it is really hard to do the inside, so a present for you for the weekend is

click on the word "HERE" above and wait for a few seconds; the inside of your screen will be cleaned for you!

08 February 2010

monday morning mayhem...


I guess we all need a few laughs in this time of financial turmoil.

I was at my bank today; there was a short line. Just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.

It was obvious She was a little irritated. ....

She asked the teller, 'Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen.

Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?'

The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, 'Fluctuations.'

The Asian lady says, 'Fluc you white people too!'

five reasons why NOT to complain about your job...

toothrush & tp


mail drop slot

elephant pooper scooper

and finally...

target practice

i wonder how he can even get out of bed in the morning?

Maxx New Friends.gif
obviously, you can figure out
these two aren't known for working...