monday morning mayhem...

back home, finally, but still need to take it very slow and easy. the energy level is low and the recovery from the back surgery is going to take a while, but the numbness is almost completely gone in my leg.

so let's start the week off right...


this week's memo from the HR Department...


please read carefully:


Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

Number 1
TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f*** you're doing.


Number 2
TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a f***ing b****.

Number 3
TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f*** do you expect me to do this?

Number 4
TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f***ing way.

Number 5
TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh**ing me!

Number 6
TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell some one who gives a sh**.

Number 7
TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f***ing problem.

Number 8
TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f***?

Number 9
TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh** won't work.

Number 10
TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f*** didn't you tell me sooner?

Number 11
TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues....
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a**.

Number 12
TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh** and die.

Number 13
TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a**.

Number 14
TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F*** it, I'm on salary.

Number 15
TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a**.

Number 16
TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD O F: This f***ing job sucks.

Number 17
TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the f*** died and made you boss?

Number 18
TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a pr***.

Thank You,

Human Resources



isn't HR wonderful?



best pool shot by naked white chick...








hope you're not Andre...





the week will not go by any faster than last week. time always moves at the same rate.

gin makes it go easier though...