monday morning mayhem...

having just been through this with my recent surgery, i think that i am immediately changing the one i gave to the hospital. this one makes a lot more sense to me...



I,__________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers/doctors interested in simply running up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Glass of Bombay Sapphire
Chocolate
Margarita
Martini
A glass of Lafitte-Rothschild
Chocolate
Filet Mignon with Crab
Creme Anglais
Italian food
Chocolate
French fries
Chocolate
Pizza
Ice cream
An Americano
Chocolate
Sex
Chocolate,

It should be presumed that I won't ever get better.

When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, let the 'fat lady sing,' and call it a day!


Have a Drink!
IT'S 5 O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE!

as an aside, i see the neurosurgeon tomorrow and i'm hoping he takes me off the restrictions i'm under. i am starting to go a little stir crazy being limited to the Family Room and guest room at my friends'. if he lets me drive, i might even be able to go home. as far as the surgery, i believe it worked. my left leg is no longer numb and my left foot doesn't feel like a brick. i'm also walking in an almost normal way - no more limping or swishing. well..., maybe a little swish. how butch!