A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00.
When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read:
Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through
Washington, DC., and those assholes deducted $95.00 in taxes.
2. eye exam...
if you can't decipher the above illusion, pull your eyes so that they are slanted, like an oriental's. i can't explain why this works. it's actually weirder than the illusion itself...
3. signage...
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
Dr. Jones, at your cervix
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In a Podiatrist's office:
Time wounds all heels.
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On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
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On a Septic Tank Truck:
We're #1 in the #2 business.
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At a Proctologist's door:
To expedite your visit please back in
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On a Plumber's truck:
We repair what your husband fixed.
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On a Plumber's truck:
Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
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Pizza Shop Slogan:
7 days without pizza makes one weak.
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At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
Invite us to your next blowout.
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On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
Hello. Can we pick your nose?
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At a Towing company:
We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
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On an Electrician's truck:
Let us remove your shorts.
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In a Nonsmoking Area:
If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
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On a Maternity Room door:
Push. Push. Push.
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At an Optometrist's Office:
If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
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On a Taxidermist's window:
We really know our stuff.
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At a Car Dealership:
The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.
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Outside a Muffler Shop:
No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.
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In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
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At the Electric Company:
We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be.
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In a Restaurant window:
Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.
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In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
Drive carefully. We'll wait.
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At a Propane Filling Station:
Thank heaven for little grills.
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Sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop:
Best place in town to take a leak.
4. payback...
i don't know what's worse. drivers using cell phones or women putting on make-up while driving. yes, i do - cell phones...
2 comments:
OMG! I've never seen you do comedy! I loved the eye exam! though it is realy kinda freaky how that works.
I like the funeral home sign. But the last one on the freeway is the best.
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