The Immutable Laws of Life...
good for 2008 - or any year, for that matter...
good for 2008 - or any year, for that matter...
Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose
will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your act.
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had
a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will
start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle
arrive last.
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask
you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
lockers.
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down
on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and
cost of the carpet or rug.
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will
stop making it.
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,
by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an
appointment and you'll stay sick.
Happy New Year!
No comments:
Post a Comment